Some things will never be understood.
Some can never really be explained.
At least... not by me.
I have been living in Brazil for just over a month now.
And so far, what I thought would be one thing, has turned out to be another.
This is without question, one of the harder journeys I have had to face.
It would very easily be listed with some others that immediately come to my mind.
I am living my life and doing things that many will never do.
I am privileged and called by God.
It is quite humbling for me.
Sometimes God calls us into season and situations that will be to us, a difficulty, but will in turn, be giving glory to Him.
Two and a half weeks left here.
I am believing that this trip will turn a corner.
That the past month of hardship will be the platform from which I will step into something supernatural.
In the future I may look at this trip with fondness.
Not forgetting the struggle I had faced but remembering it as a memoriam where God worked miracles.
Where He worked in the lives of others through me even when I had not seen it at the first glance of my eye.
Where He worked something in me that built me and prepared me for other things.
For those that read this who have heard firsthand my struggles here, remember not to think I took in vain the call of God.
For because of that call, even when I wanted to run home before my time was spent, I stayed.
It was a time where I pushed through my own emotions, walked in obedience, walked in faith, and trusted God.
From here I will only go on to bigger and brighter things.
Maybe not in the same way as I have now.
But in all the ways God can work with His hand.
Matthew Barnett said, "Your ministry is in your misery."
Maybe through past experience.
Maybe a childhood you had no control over.
Maybe just a season of testing with God.
And in this I have seen it proven true.
Through all my seasons; before my heart was after the Lord and after, through the things I could control and the things I couldn't.
All that I have walked through, has given me the experience, the maturity, the wisdom, and the opportunity to touch another life for the purpose of Christ.
Whether in those moments I was conscious or not of the change I brought.
Not only are the words I speak a testimony of my Jesus; my Savior.
But the life I LIVE is a testimony that words are not needed for.
To be able to influence like this or have the opportunities I have, the ones I never planned for, are the grace of God.
For He does far ABOVE all I can THINK or IMAGINE.
Above all my DREAMS or my HOPES.
Above all my DESIRES.
And then, in a moment of adoration and worship, in a moment of awe of my Jesus, I realize something.
His desires and His dreams, His thoughts and His hopes for me are so. much. better.
Then, all at once, a moment of inspiration.
A moment where God breathes.
I am enraptured.
He stirs inside of me.
I am one with my God.
And HIS dreams become MY dreams.
I find something.
I find my IDENTITY,
The one i was CREATED FOR.
I find the PURPOSE I had been searching for,
My Jesus is my completeness.
